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Unpredictable…

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Life is unpredictable, to say the least.

“Life is what happens while we’re making other plans.” ~ John Lennon.

True, that.

As a youngster I used to believe you should plan things. What and where you are going to study after school. What are you going to do when you finish your studies, and where. Plan, plan, plan.

That way, I thought, nothing can happen to surprise you. How could I have been so naive? So stupid? Of course we all know that life is not like that. At all. For some even less so than for others.

I’ve know people who’s lives came close to that predictability. The couples both had jobs, which they neither loved or hated, but it brought in two fairly good salaries. They had their children, one car, then later two, they planned yearly holidays away. Safe, secure. Except of course for retrenchments, affairs, medical emergencies, or deaths in the family, which is something that always causes turmoil in a peaceful existence.

My life had never been like that. It had always been prone to changes, sometimes literally from one day to the next. Financial stability was never a thing. Changes happened often. Sometimes it was difficult to adjust, other times a little less so. ‘Adapt or die’ certainly rang true in my life.

On a positive note, I can say that life was never boring. How could it be?

I also thought that by the time I hit that ‘certain age’ I spoke about yesterday, my life would be settled, calm and serene. It should be, don’t you think? The turmoil of raising kids is over, my working days coming to an end (?) and peace should set in.

But NO, not so. Things seem to be carrying on the way it has always been. Unpredictable. Changeable.

I’m trying to find that pocket of calm for myself to escape to, where I can breathe deeply and feel peace. Some days I find it, some days not.

I wonder if it is something I’m doing, or not doing… Maybe I should see my life as predictable in its unpredictability?

(One thing I do know for a fact – Covid bloody 19 has come and upset the apple cart properly, and not only for me. I think a gazillion people’s lives have been knocked sideways since the beginning of last year. I think those who thought they had predictable, planned lives, think differently now… )